earn it

earn it.

it was a repeated admonition my grandfather always made to me throughout my grade school youth, frequently delivered with varying degrees of exasperation and disapproval, particularly if he felt i was exhibiting symptoms of entitlement or a lack of diligence.

did i want recognition? earn it.

did i want gratitude? earn it.

did i want an allowance? earn it.

did i want time to spend with my friends? earn it.

i remember there was one time when we'd been eating a bag of his favorite food: pecans. he'd been breaking them open with a nut-cracker, and alternating handing them to me and eating them himself. being young and perpetually hungry, i'd been eating them faster than he could open them, and had taken to holding out my hand to ask for more.

i remember he'd stopped, and with a voice thick in an equal parts mixture of disappointment and disgust pointed his finger at me and said "don't beg. don't act like you deserve things. don't think you can get anything for free."

his delivery at the time was a little harsh, but it was one that he always made at that stage of my life: nothing is free. there is always a price that has to be paid, and no one else can pay it for you. as a result, if you want something, you have to be willing to do what it takes to earn it.

i've come to think about those words a lot in the years since he passed away. particularly as i've gotten older and encountered things that i never expected or could have understood as a child, things that confronted me with the true nature of the challenges of living that exist this world. i've come to take the words beyond the literal sense to a more figurative one, since i've found in them a certain truth that's helped me understand how to resolve the things i've seen.

you see, life is fragile. as a result, nothing is guaranteed. which means that the things we want to see preserved and propagated require action by us to do so. because in a world where suffering is common and brutality is so often the norm, the few good things that exist--the kind of things associated with words like just and noble and virtuous and kind, the kind of things that make the world a better place, the kind of things that make life worth living--have a value that cannot be described or measured or perceived...a value that must, if they are to continue, be paid. as a result, they must be respected, not just for the cost incurred to keep them but also for what they represent: something with meaning in a world that has none.

it's helped me learn how to appreciate things more. and thereby helped me to get a deeper sense of life and living. and to accept just what it means for there to be good, and just what it takes to get there.

because nothing is free. there is always a price that has to be paid, and no one else can pay it for you. as a result, if you want something, you have to be willing to do what it takes to earn it.

particularly if it's special, particularly if it's important, particularly if it's good. which in this world is everything. that's what makes it priceless.

you want to be an Ironman? earn it.

you want to have an A? earn it.

you want to have a house? earn it.

you want to have a job? earn it.

you want true love? earn it.

you want to eat? earn it.

you want to breathe? earn it.

you want to live? earn it.

earn it.